Drown
by Agent Silver
Summary: My tribute for Dr. Otto Octavius' noble sacrifice at the end of the movie. Otto is drowning underwater and dying....what was he thinking? SM2 spoilers oneshot


(Read my profile for disclaimers)

_**Drown**_

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_   
  
It's getting closer to the end  
  
Every part of me_

Peter was right. Every thing I've done was wrong. All wrong. It wasn't helping mankind, it was destroying it. How could I be so stupid? How could I not looked at what was lying in front of me? I've been blind... and I feel awake. Awake from all of this. And now I'm free. No more pain. No more crying for my Rosie. I lie underwater, drowning. This is the end. This is it. My death. I beckon for it to come near. Rid of my monsters that has been pulling the strings all along. They hurt people. They hurt Peter. And I must get them off my back.  
  
I sink underneath the water, the boiling heat from the fusion reactor burning me alive. Not only am I drowning, but I'm burning also. Both hot and cold are killing me. Strange huh?

_Then disaster takes its toll  
  
And now I'm left with only me_

Peter couldn't save me this time. He couldn't save me after he just woke me up. I'm sinking, dying to me and my arm's despair, running out of oxygen. I allow the hot water to fill my lungs.  
  
I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry if I hurt Peter, I'm sorry if I killed Rosie, I'm sorry if I hurt Harry or anyone, or even Mary Jane. She is such a beauty, like Rosie. She reminds me so much of her. The girl has a strong will, I wish Peter good luck. They even look good together. And I hope by learning of my mistakes, that they will stay together. Unlike Rosie and me.  
  
I thought about what Peter had said. Sometimes we must lose everything we have in order for things to be right. Peter's advice really means a lot to me in my last breath. I'm glad we've become at least friends. The time we spent together with my wife discussing the project was the core of our friendship. I really liked the boy with his knowledge. He taught me that not every kid could be a slacker of science. I hope he took the privilege of knowledge for mankind seriously.  
  
_Maybe sorrow plays a roll  
  
When you feel unkind_  
  
It was the arm's entire fault the begin with. They controlled me. They comforted me, yeah, but they controlled me. They caused pain to other people. Well, that will never happen again. I hoped that the old lady I picked out of random during the bank robbery was okay. I hoped that the people in the train or the person that was in that Taxi that could've hit me was also okay. I'm glad Spider-man, Peter, went in and rescue them. I'm glad he took the responsibility to help New York.  
  
I'm also glad that I took the responsibility to sacrificing myself. Or else, it would've been Peter down here drowning under the hot, boiling water, dying.  
  
_Your abuse is medicine  
  
And I'm forever lost in time_  
  
The arms will not hurt or murder anyone no more. Never again. They will go down with me. They will die with me.  
  
_Save me  
  
Save me before I drown..._

_Save me  
  
Save me before I drown..._  
  
"I WILL NOT DIE AS A MONSTER!!!" I remember screaming, tearing the machine up. How I always wanted to die as an old man and see a happy future with my wife. How I always wanted to die in a nice warm bed like every other human being did. How I wanted to tell stories. How I now wished to have a child. How I wanted my dreams to come true. How I wanted to be a hero. I'd never know if Peter looks up to me or not.  
  
I'm dying...  
  
I'm praying...  
  
Deceiving... running out of air...  
  
I'm too lost to be saved. I will die once more, but I will never wake after that.  
  
_It's getting closer to the end  
  
I look back and smile_  
  
Oh how everything were back then. I try to smile while I sink, while I drown. I remember the love Rosie and me had. How she was into poetry and I was in science. We were in college back then. It hurts to reflect back on memories. But I'm dying anyway. I've become so numb now.  
  
I remember how my father tries to teach me how to be a man. At least he tried; I only committed myself to science. Now I'm dying. I remember all those times my mother used to protect me. How kids picked on me because of my knowledge. I keep reminding myself that brilliance is important, that was to be used to help mankind. I always believed it.  
  
But my dreams were far from my philosophy.  
  
Now I wished that Peter would jump in and save me from drowning. But I know he can't because he will die too. I wished fate ended me in a better life, a better place than this painful way of death. But it was inevitable. I must go through what I must go through.  
  
But what have I done wrong? Life was so full of many choices, why did following my dreams of science the worst and painful one? Why? Why must it come this way? All I ever had left was the arms in my spine that controlled me to hurt people.  
  
_We conquered every single bump in my road  
  
Made it all worth while_  
  
But yet, the arms did save my life for such a little while. That Taxi could've killed me...but on second thought I wished it did. Much better than this death. At least it is saving millions of lives now. Yes, the arms were magnificent at the time. They comforted me, loved me, and tried to cheer me up.  
  
At least my brilliance was all a worthwhile for such a short amount of time.  
  
_Just remember how I cared  
  
When it came crashing down_  
  
And now I fall to my death...I'm drowning...  
  
I wished I never chose to do the evilest actions man could ever do. I wished I never caused pain or destruction to everything else. I wished I'd never allow the arms to kill those doctors.  
  
This is my consequence for my actions and I will take it responsibly.  
  
_Like to toast to all those angels  
  
That were always hanging around  
_  
I place my life...I sacrifice my life, Spider-man...for you. Peter...I sense a better future coming up. I sense that people will look up to you, will save you as you saved them. I saw how grateful of them for you at the train. The stood up for you even if it was hopeless.  
  
You are a hero, Peter. I'm proud that you took the job. And here I am throwing my life away to give you the opportunity to continue being a hero. You will live a hero and die like one. But I certainly hope that you would retire before that happens.  
  
Unfortunately for you, you cannot save me this time. And I don't blame you of my mistake. Take care of New York, my friend...take care of mankind.  
  
_Save me  
  
Save me before I drown..._

_Save me  
  
Save me before I drown.._

_._

Take care of it...Peter...

_Maybe life ain't what it seems  
  
'cuz it's all a dream  
  
Forgive me_  
  
Yet, I've lived a long life, with happy memories. I'm sad that it didn't end as happy. I just wished I were given a second chance in life, a second chance where everyone would forgive me. Maybe life would've turned out different. Maybe the fusion reactor would've stabilized. The world would live better with free electricity anyway.  
  
I guess I was too stubborn. I guess I died when the arms killed those doctors at the hospital. I guess it had to be this way...  
  
_Sometimes I feel like a fool  
  
'cuz I'm so uncool_  
  
Now I lie on the ocean floor, my oxygen no more. My vision fade to black slowly and blurry. My mechanical arms cry fiercely to be spared, but I will not fall for that this time. I watched as the pier fall to me, as the fusion reactor explodes to become no more.  
  
The arms screamed in my head unlike any other scream I have ever heard:  
  
**FATHER! FATHER! WE ARE SCARED! HOLD US!  
  
WE DON'T WANT TO DIE!  
  
FATHER!!!!  
**  
I ignore their cries like the way I ignore the people's cries for help when I was attacking. This is it. Goodbye my readers...  
  
But as John Greenleaf Whittier put it, "_For of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: it might've been_!"  
  
_Forgive me..._

__

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**Limp Bizkit  
  
Drown**  
  
(Read 'n' review ) 


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